Teri Meri Kahaani II

2012 was here.The year the world was supposed to end.Rajiv was fine with that.His foremost concern was just that he would be headed to the other side without a taste of love.Lately a nagging realization had been slowly growing within him-that deep down somewhere he had been comparing all women in his life with Rashmi.She was the benchmark.The unadulterated mercury with which he measured a prospect's hotness in his compatibility thermometer.

So you know you are in love.What happens next?Do you call her up in the middle of the night,when she wakes up all groggy eyes and wonders if you are out of your senses,and then drop the bomb on her?Do you jump the guns on her the moment her name appears in your online chat friends list?Or,in case,you want to avoid being too direct,do you shoot off a long mail pouring out every ounce of pure emotion you felt for her?

Rajiv didn't know what to do.He was afraid that whatever option he selected on the multiple choice question paper of love,he would inevitably flunk.In the high school where Cupid is the Principal,Rajiv was notorious for fetching bad grades.So he just sat on his feelings,like a hen sits on her eggs.Foolishly hoping that love would hatch out of them on its own.

January 2012 Gtalk chat
Rashmi: Wass with you?You don't come on FB.No skype.No gtalk.Is everything all right?I can't even remember the last time we had a chat.
Rajiv wondered why even deliberately avoiding Rashmi hadn't helped decrease his feelings towards her one little bit.
Rajiv:Yep.Everything's cool.You say.How are things @ ur end?
Rashmi:Okayish.I am in a long distance kinda something with this guy I told you about.
Rajiv:The PhD guy?
Rashmi:Hmmmm
Rajiv:What's this guy's name?I am tired of just calling him PhD guy!!!!
Rashmi:Pranabesh.Pranabesh Thakur.
Rajiv:Told your folks back home?
Rashmi:Yep.For the first time,my parents seem to approve of my choice.:-P
Rajiv:Ohhh..okk.Gr8.
Rashmi:Umm..you don't sound so excited.
Did Pakistan sound very excited when India ended its World Cup dream in the semi-finals?
Rajiv:It's nothing.Got an important thing @ my office tomorrow.So I am kinda off.Sorry about that.
Rashmi:Ok.
Rajiv:So I take it you aren't so lonely out there anymore,right?:-)
Rashmi:I can't say that.It's still long distance and all.Sometimes I still feel utterly miserable here.:-(
Rajiv:Hey gtg.Will ttyl..ok??
Rashmi:What?!! :-O We haven't talked to each other since so long..and you leaving now??
Rajiv:Yep.Sorry.Have a long day @ office tomorrow.SO...
Rashmi:Ohh..it's ok...Bye...best of luck @ the office:-)

Rajiv chose to opt out of opting for options.He didn't want to be said No to.So he never asked.
But take a guy who is in love on one hand.
And his expressing his feelings before the gal on the other.
And you know that the two will inevitably draw themselves to each other.
It is destiny.It's fate.
Just like pirated downloads and anybody with an internet connection inevitably draw themselves to each other.

And so it was,on February 2012,that Rajiv finally decided to take the plunge into the icy cold waters of friendship-turned-into-love.He would finally tell her what he felt for her and get over with it.Leave the rest for HER to decide.And maybe,Cupid!

10 February 2012 Gtalk chat
Rajiv:Hey,I needed to say something important.
Rashmi:Umm...I have something to say too.
Rajiv:Ok..you first!! :-)
Rashmi:No no..you say what you want to..
Rajiv:I insist!! :-)
Rashmi: Cut the crap out,Rajiv!!!!Say it...
Rajiv:I said,I insist!!:-)
Rashmi:Umm...I dunno how to say it.
Rajiv:Try typing it out one word at a time.:-P
Rashmi:I wish I could laugh now..but I ain't really in any mood for it.
Rajiv:Why? :-( What's wrong?
Rashmi:Nothing.
Rajiv:Now I'm getting worried.
Rashmi:Hmm..
Rajiv:Would you tell me already?
Rashmi:It's not that easy to say,Rajiv.If it were I would have told you.
Rajiv:Just tell me,ok?
Rashmi:I think I maybe pregnant.
Rajiv:What??!!!!
Rashmi:Yes.Now you know why I was hesitating.
Rajiv couldn't help thinking he had just waited around far too long.
Rajiv:Would I get to know exactly how this happened?:-O
Rashmi:Remember that guy I told you about?The PhD one?
Rajiv:Woooaah!!You don't say...
Rashmi:Hmmm.. :-(
Rajiv:Wow!For the first time,I don't really know what to say.
Rashmi:I am just such a bad person!I feel so cheap!:-(
Rajiv:Hey..hey..hey!!Hold on there.You got lonely.And stuff happened.It's cool.:-) Cheer up!Btw,you sure about the pregnancy thingy?
Rashmi:Umm..I dunno.I will go to the clinic tomorrow just to be sure.
Rajiv:Ok.
Rashmi:I just hate to imagine what you must be thinking about me right now.
Rajiv:I am not thinking anything.
Rashmi:Don't tell me you are ok with all of this!!!
Rajiv:I am.Except one thing.
Rashmi:What?
Rajiv:Why the hell didn't you use protection??!!! :-D
Rashmi::-( :-( :-(
Rajiv:Hey it is ok.You both are full grown adults.There is nothing wrong in making out!!
Rashmi:My parents are gonna freak out!!!:-( They trusted me and this is how I repaid them.
Rajiv:Ok..don't tell your parents.Problem solved.
Rashmi:I have to.
Rajiv:Why?
Rashmi:Coz he and I want to keep the baby!
Rajiv:What?You sure?
Rashmi:I was reluctant.But he insists we should keep it.And he has already told his mom.It's my turn now!
Rajiv:Woaah!
Rashmi:It sounds bad.I know.:-(
Rajiv:Everything's gonna be all right,Rashmi.:-) Cheer up.Your parents may be angry at the beginning.But hey..they will understand.You staying away from friends and family for so long.They must have guessed you may have made out once or twice.It's ok..Trust me.
Rashmi:I wish you were my dad,Rajiv! :-(
Rajiv:Best of luck...and hey...you never know...maybe you are not pregnant after all.See what the clinic says.
Rashmi:Fingers crossed,Rajiv.:-(
Rajiv:Everything's gonna be ok.Relax.:-)
Rashmi:You know it's weird.Three years ago,I never imagined in my wildest dreams that one day I would in...THIS.So messed up.I mean I'm gonna get married to this guy!!!And this whole thing had to happen like this.I feel so...
Rajiv:Hmm?
Rashmi:I dunno...
Rajiv:That's what life is,I guess.Takes you by surprise.:-) I've realized it now too.
Rashmi:You did?Why?
Rajiv:Never mind.:-) Not important.

11February Facebook
Rashmi:It's official.I'm carrying a baby!!
Rajiv felt something sharp stab through somewhere in him.
Rajiv:Hmmm..and how do you feel about it?
Rashmi:I honestly dunno.At one level...I kinda feel good actually.That I am gonna bring this baby to earth.At another..I am just shit scared!
Rajiv:Told your home yet?
Rashmi:I hate to think how my parents will react!!!:-(
Rajiv:You have to tell them sooner or later.Delaying will only make it worse.They deserve to know,Rashmi!
Rashmi:I hate it when others tell you something you don't want to do and you know deep down they are right!!:-(
Rajiv:Ok.Don't tell your folks!!!Marry this guy!!And then 9 months later...tell ur mom and dad on Skype..Hi mom...hi dad..Look you just became granma and grandad!!!Isn't he cute??Dad,I think he got your nose!!And mom,your lips!! :-P
Rashmi: :-D
Rajiv: :-D Now THAT would be something your parents might freak out over!!!
Rashmi: :-) Thanks for listening to all this,Rajiv.I couldn't tell it to anybody else.
Rajiv:What?You mean...no one else knows?
Rashmi:No.And please keep it to yourself.Please.
Rajiv:Of course.You don't need to tell me that.
Rashmi:Rajiv?
Rajiv:Yeah?
Rashmi:I still dunno if we should bring this baby!What if we can't handle it?Both of us still have our studies.I will be off my PhD for a considerable time because of all this.What if I mess up everything?
Rajiv:Look,Rashmi.I dunno what should be done and what shouldn't.All I know is-it takes a lot of courage to be ready to bring an unplanned baby into this world.And you guys already showed that courage.I am proud of you for that.And even if you don't decide to give birth,it is still ok.Coz if you feel you are not ready to be a mom yet,it's best for the baby that it doesn't come here.In either case,do whatever you are ready to face the consequences for.No point debating what's right and what's wrong.10 people will give 10 different opinions.Just take a decision and stick with it.
Rashmi:Hmm.:-( I guess I cannot take a decision I am ready to stick with.. yet.
Rajiv:It's ok.You will do fine.:-) Trust me.

15th March Skype
Rashmi:I dunno if I can go through this!!!!
Rajiv:Hey...don't freak out now!!Everything is going alright,right?Your parents accepted your situation.Pranabesh is ready to tie the knot with you.And I am sure your university will be able to accomodate your pregnancy in your PhD thing,won't it?
Somewhere deep down though,Rajiv couldn't help wishing that things hadn't worked out so well.
Rashmi:It's not the logistics,Rajiv!I dunno if I want to marry this guy!!
Rajiv:Pre-wedding jitters,huh? :-)
Rashmi: :-( I guess.
Rajiv: Hmmm...
Rajiv mulled over whether to tell her now what he had in mind for so long.
Rashmi: Rajiv,do you think it is possible to find the perfect guy to fall in love with?
Rajiv:Umm..why do you ask?
Rashmi:It's like...it is always a compromise,right? You can't have a perfect score on the compatibility test,ever!!Right?
Second thoughts about Pranabesh?Was this the right time to tell her how he felt about her?
Rajiv:Well,yeah.It's just about finding the best fit.Through trial and error.
Rashmi:And time is a constraint here.We've to find someone in a finite time.
Rajiv:What are you getting at?
Rashmi:Nothing.Just trying to convince myself that settling down with Pranabesh isn't such a bad idea after all.:-(
Fuck!!Rajiv couldn't do this!!!
Rajiv:It isn't.:-) He asked you not to drop the baby.He seems to be a good guy.
Problem was-Rajiv was one too.
Rashmi:He is.Just that I dunno if I love him.
Rajiv:Have you told him about it?
Rashmi:No.
Rajiv:Maybe you should.
And there he was,playing the selfless knight in shining armor when it would have better suited him to play the scheming minister who wants to usurp the throne.
Rashmi:What's the use,Rajiv?The marriage date is fixed.There is no going back now.
Rajiv:You can at least push back the marriage.Give yourself time to think about it.
The scheming minister was rearing its ugly head somewhere.
Rashmi:Mom and dad will never accept this.
Rajiv:You don't know that yet....!!!!!!And you'll never know if you don't tell them.
Rashmi:Leave it,Rajiv.Guess I'll just take what comes my way.
Rajiv:Aren't you being stupid now?
Rashmi:I've already done the stupidest thing possible!!!How far worse can I get?
Rajiv:You are being unrealistic here.Your guilt is blinding you.
Rashmi:I dunno anymore.I dunno anything.
Rajiv:You can't let your guilt blind you.After all,you haven't done anything wrong.
Rashmi:Rajiv?
Rajiv:Yeah?
Rashmi:If this marriage craps out and say you don't find someone by then as well,will you marry me?
Rajiv:Without a second's hesitation.:-D
As if she needed to ask!!!!
Rashmi: :-) I knew you would say this.You sweet you!!!!!!!
Rajiv: :-)

1st April Skype
Rashmi:I did something bad!:-(
Rajiv:Huh?
Rashmi:We decided not to have the baby after all.:-( The marriage is still on,though.
Rajiv:Ohh..
Rajiv would have preferred to hear the same thing with the positions of the baby and the marriage reversed.But wishful thinking can only get you so far.
Rashmi::-(
Rajiv:And how do you feel about this right now?
Rashmi:It's funny.I mean the thought of becoming a mom was finally becoming likeable to me.Yes,there was this concern about responsibilities.But still.There was this some kinda warm inner glow.
Rajiv::-) Must be the hormones hopping and dancing about like the hippies in Redwood National Forest.
Rashmi: :-( Slowly,right and wrong are just becoming text-book words for me.I am doing this,I am thinking that,I am going back on my promises,my decisions changing every second.Why did life suddenly have to become so confusing????
Rajiv:Yeah.:-( Life is confusing me too a lot these days.
Rashmi:Huh??
Another opportunity to tell her.But he would just let go of it.Just like he had done several times before.
Rajiv:Yep.Chuck that.:-) But you know,maybe you two did the right thing.If you guys don't feel ready for this baby,then maybe it is best if the baby doesn't come.A baby deserves a better environment to grow up in.You probably couldn't give that to it right now.
Rashmi: :-( You will always say I didn't do anything wrong,right?No matter how badly I screw up...???
Rajiv:LOL.
Rashmi:No.I'm serious.And it's like I know I'll always get to hear what I need to hear when I'm with you.And that makes me want to talk with you again and again.You're becoming my addiction.
Rajiv:Nonsense.:-P Of course you goofed up.You goofed up bad.;-)
Rashmi: I did,didn't I? :-( I shouldn't have made out.Fuck!
Rajiv:Nyah...you definitely should have.:-) But you just goofed up by not using protection.That's the only mistake you made in my book.
Rashmi::-D Your book? What's it called? "Mistakes which Rashmi can make in my opinion"?I'm sure it must be a flimsy thin book with only a couple of pages.
Rajiv:Nyah.Just a couple of sentences.At most. ;-)

23 April Gtalk chat
Rajiv:28th June,huh? :-) The D-day!!!!
Rashmi: :-) He he.Now it is starting to feel kinda nice you know...all the attention!!Mom and dad enquiring whether I have eaten well every night.I mean they always used to do that.But now there is this extra concern.And Pranabesh's mom calls too.Almost twice every week.
Rajiv:Uh..huh....Being pampered like royalty,huh??? :-D
Rashmi:He he..yeah...hey you know something?A gal at my college asked me a weird thing today.
Rajiv:What?
Rashmi:She asked me if I knew any single nice guy around.LOL.:-D
Rajiv:And lemme guess...the first name that popped to your head was mine? ;-)
Rashmi:Well...not exactly.:-D
Rajiv:O boy!!:-( I don't even qualify as a single nice guy anymore? And I stayed alive to see this day!!!
Rashmi:LOL.No.I meant this idea of fixing someone with someone else.I always found this weird.
Rajiv:Weird?Why?
Rashmi:Well,I dunno.:-) I mean this whole idea....it's kinda like arranged marriage somewhat...I feel..:-P
Rajiv:LOL.
Rashmi:Gawwd!!I feel so relieved these days.:-) It's like the clouds have swept away.And it finally feels so good to be engaging in pointless banter with you.
Rajiv:Yep.Been a long time since we chatted on inane nonsensical stuff.:-D
Rashmi:Do you watch BBT?
Rajiv:I love it!!!Bazingaa!!
Rashmi::-D He he..Sheldon Cooper rocks!!
Rajiv:He practically owns the show.:-D
Rashmi:Are you into Lost?I am watching the final season now.
Rajiv:Nyah.I just get lost in watching BBT.:-D
Rashmi:You should try Lost.:-)
Rajiv:Hmm...yeah after season 5 of BBT gets over,I guess I will need a new series to grow addicted to.:-P
Rashmi:Rajiv?
Rajiv:Yep?
Rashmi:Thanks for everything.:-)
Rajiv:Why?:-) I didn't do anything.Pranabesh did.:-P
Rashmi:LOL.No.I meant thanks.Thanks to you for just being you.:-D

Sometimes in life,you don't know what you want.And sometimes,you know exactly what you want.And for one of the few times in his life,Rajiv realized what he exactly wanted.He wanted a happy ending.For himself,of course,in the long run.But right now,he just wanted it for Rashmi.

And the day finally arrived.28th June,2012.The day he would lose Rashmi to another guy forever.Strangely enough,he wasn't feeling that bad.He was experiencing one of those rare moments when losing something brings more of a sense of accomplishment than winning it.And as he walked up to Rashmi that day,all decked in bridal wear,he couldn't help wondering how things might have played out differently if only both of them had taken different decisions four years ago.

"Long time,huh?" Rashmi smiled at Rajiv."You've slimmed down a bit."
"Yep.And you haven't done too bad with youself either," Rajiv replied,giving Rashmi an appreciative head-to-toe scan."Say,last chance.I am here.A taxi is waiting outside.Do you still wanna make a run for it?"
"Hahahhaa", Rashmi's laughter swam into his eardrums like musical notes floating on air waves."Don't make that offer again!!You hear me?I might start seriously considering it otherwise."
Rajiv grinned.Rashmi punched him in the shoulder.
"Hey I have to go," Rashmi said in a hurried tone."Lots of stuff to take care of.You wait right here,ok?Don't go away!!!"
"Busy bride,huh?"Rajiv winked."I will be right here."

As Rashmi left,Rajiv started looking around at the wedding hall and the guest assembled.Rashmi was at a distance,merrily conversing with a group of guests.Suddenly,a female voice beckoned him from behind.
"So you are Rajiv,huh?Rashmi told me a lot about you."
Rajiv spun around to see a girl in her mid-twenties standing before him.While not drop-dead gorgeous and a bit on the heavier side,she had a stunning smile and sparkling eyes.
"Mostly good stuff,I hope," Rajiv smiled awkwardly.Talking to strangers,that too from the opposite gender,didn't come so naturally to him.
"He he,mostly yeah." Her eyes shone naughtily."My name is Radha,by the way."
"Rajiv,Rashmi,Radha,lots of R's," Rajiv observed with a joking smile.
"He he," Radha's laughter reminded him of trinkets jingling in a silent night."All your characters have names starting with R too,don't they?"
"What?"
"Your stories.On your blog.Many of them have the protagonist's name starting with R." Radha's eyes sparkled even more brightly as she said this.
"You read my blog?"
"Yep.Rashmi told me about it.I got hooked to your posts.Read all of them in a week."
"What??"
"He he,yeah.You have a stalker now,"Radha winked mischievously.
Rajiv immediately turned to look in Rashmi's direction.Rashmi smiled at him from where she was standing.Suddenly,snatches of a chat conversation they had in April flashed in his memory.Rashmi was trying to fix him up with this gal!!
"Wow,a stalker,"Rajiv smiled and turned to look at Radha again."Having one had always been a To-Do in my list of accomplishments."
"So what about your Hogwarts series?You left it midway.Why?"
"Not enough readers."
"Well you got me,"Radha smiled her bewitching smile."Your most loyal reader ever.That won't do?"
"It's certainly worth giving a thought,I guess," Rajiv brushed his hand through his hair as his grin widened from ear to ear.

The End