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A long time ago.

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In a galaxy far, far away.

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Yoda

DO or DO NOT. There is no TRY.

Darth Vader

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The Force Awakens

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X-Wing Fighter

Long live the Rebel Alliance.

July 22, 2012

A Life Les Ordinary-II

"Finding out the gal you are totally nuts for is a lesbian?Ouch!Must have hurt," Satish tried to sympathize with Rohit.

"I still can't fucking believe it," Rohit grunted in response.

"And she had nothing to say about all this?" Satish asked curiously.

"Yeah.'I was born this way and I can't help being who I am',that's all," Rohit jaw tightened.

"No fancy explanations,huh?" Satish asked again.

"None."

~~~~~~
10 kms away,in her 2 bedroom apartment,Riya and Annesha were having a heart-to-heart too.
"Gosh!I'm feeling so bad about this," Annesha looked guiltily at her friend."We shouldn't have drunk so much yesterday.We screwed up bad,didn't we?"

Riya said grimly,"He had to find out one day or the other."

"I can't help feeling bad for Rohit," Annesha shook her head sadly."Poor chap."

"He's a nice guy,"Riya's tone became softer."It's tough for him,I know."

"I wish he didn't have to find out this way though,"Annesha looked at her friend, expecting a response.

"How do you think he is coping?" Riya asked after a moment of silence,more to herself than to anyone else.

~~~~~~
"Okay?????????!!" Rohit screamed as he paced the floor frantically."How the fuck do you think I'm gonna be okay??My gf and her good-for-nothing buddy are together at her apartment right now.Banging each other away to glory,for all I know."

"Technically,there'd be no banging,"Satish pointed out."Just licking,fondling and cuddling.But...I get your point."
When a guy gets one thing straight- that his girlfriend is not,he needs a reliable guy to take one's troubles to.And Satish could be relied on with blind faith to say something utterly inappropriate in all such circumstances.

"Spare me that tongue-in-cheek humor." Rohit's eyes narrowed as he looked at his friend.Totally peeved.

"Tongue?"Satish's lips curled into a half-smile."Isn't that what your gf and her lesbian friend must be using right now???!"

"Fuck you!" Rohit uttered,utterly vexed.

"What?" Satish eyes lit up with mischief,"You want us to end up banging each other?Thanks,but I'll pass."

Rohit mumbled some curses in frustration.

~~~~~~
"He must be screaming his heart out to that useless friend of his...Satish," Riya said."He can become quite a cry baby sometimes."

"And Satish is a great confider?" Annesha queried.

"Far from it,"Riya chuckled."You know the type of guy who stays away from women...because they're too scared???...and then sit back and make fun of all people in committed relationships?"

"Oh boy!!The perfect guy to take your relationship problems to,"Annesha grinned.

~~~~~~
"Hey,you know this reminds me of a joke,"Satish said in a jocund tone.

"Yeah,shove it up your ass,"Rohit answered without looking up.

"I'll tell it to you anyway,"Satish continued, unperturbed and merrily."Question-how can you tell a tough lesbian bar?"

"Lots of chicks singing folk-songs about the.... empowering experience?"Rohit ventured,forcing a smile.He needed to diffuse his steam and a few laughs wouldn't hurt.

"He he,no," Satish guffawed."The answer is-even the pool table won't have balls."

Rohit couldn't help chuckling.

"You know there is always this thing I was curious about with lesbos and gays,"Satish put on a thoughtful face."Who decides who gets to be the man in the relationship?"

Rohit didn't answer.He just kept on looking into the distance, and Satish continued."Hmmm...Riya is the more assertive one.Yep.That's gotta be it."

"What makes you think they need to crack their heads over that kinda thing?"Rohit presently said.

"What?"Satish blinked at his friend.

"Gays won't necessarily need pre-outlined gender roles,would they?"Rohit said after reflecting a bit.

~~~~~~
"This thing about Rohit.." Riya said to her friend as she huddled a pillow on her sofa,"..he is just so easy to talk to regarding a number of things.He always tries to figure out another person's POV."

"Uh.huh?"Annesha spoke.

"He is the first guy I technically didn't say 'no' to," Riya went on."The others before him...I just had to shoot down..."

"Coz he is different?"

"Kind of,"Riya bit her lip thoughtfully."I mean when I am with him,our conversations happen outside of some societal weight.... or expectation of norms.... you know..."

"Perfect male buddy for a lesbian to have,huh?"Annesha said with an amused expression.

~~~~~~
"Any romantic relationship....homosexual or otherwise... always has a dominant one and a submissive one!" Satish raised his voice."Someone leads.The other follows."

Rohit kept silent.He had never been much for pre-set, narrowly defined ways in which relationships were expected to behave.If you take away what everyone tells you it means to be a man or a woman and what that implies for how you supposedly must exist in the world then, well, you just have a bunch of people trying to adapt to a changing world and do the best they can while caring for and loving the people around them.

~~~~~~
"Look,you know how I've been.No one ever told me to wait for a Prince Charming to arrive on a white horse. I didn't grow up with roles and expectations around how my relationships would function.I could easily tell Rohit all that.He used to get me,"Riya said as she fiddled with her cell phone.

"A very understanding kinda guy,huh?"Annesha asked sympathetically.

"Very."

~~~~~~
"What do you think they must be doing right now?"Satish asked Rohit.

"Planning their children,for all I care,"Rohit answered sourly.

"Like who will give birth to the baby and all that?"Satish grinned mischievously.

"And ask me to be the sperm donor?"Rohit smiled wryly."Nah.I guess adoption is the route they are gonna bet on."

Satish's grin got wider."He he,maybe they are quarreling over whose career would be more important than the other after they have children."

Rohit replied with a smirk,"Yeah.Fighting over how to divide housework and childcare on top of that!"

~~~~~~
"But he's very moody,"Riya said."He will cry and whine like a baby sometimes.Say stuff which he doesn't mean.Just because he is hurt."

"Looks like you know him better than he might know himself,"Annesha said appreciatively.

"Maybe I do,"Riya replied."Which makes me feel all the worse for it.I should have said no to him three months ago."

"Hmmm.If you don't love him,maybe you should't have led him on.I am not judging you or anything.Just saying."

"Who said I don't love him?"

"You do?"

"I love a number of men, but have never been interested in them romantically.And out of them,I love him the most.I can say it as many times as you wish me to.I love him.Seeing him hurt makes me hurt.And knowing I caused this pain..well...." Riya's voice trembled a bit as she left her sentence unfinished.

Annesha went over to Riya's side of the couch to hug her.As her friend held her,Riya went on,"I don't go about my life or reach out to my friends for companionship or advice because of their gender.I hate grouping my male friends and my female friends into separate categories of human beings.I mean,it sometimes feels weird that I have to think that they are inherently different in what they have to offer just because of their chromosomes."

"Yes but...unlike me...you are an out and out homosexual,"Annesha said soothingly."I have bisexual tendencies.But I know I can still get attracted to a guy.That's why Akash and I are still going strong.But you can never feel attracted to Rohit.It simply won't work."

"Yeah,"Riya sighed."I know.It's just...I don't want to lose him...that will hurt me too much.You know something?"

"What?"

"I wish he were gay too.That way he would never get attracted to me.And we would still remain friends."

~~~~~~
"I should've seen it coming," Rohit said quietly."The signs.They were all around."

"Hmmm?"Satish's tone became querulous.


"Never wearing make-up, always wearing baggy clothing.Because typically she was not trying to attract men."

"Interesting,"Satish pinched his chin thoughtfully."And most of her friends are male."

"Exactly," Rohit snapped."She feels more comfortable with people she is not sexually attracted to.And there's something more."

"What?"

"Whenever I used her laptop,I found her browser history always clean."

"You mean to say.." Satish began questioningly.

"She used to check out lesbian porn,dammit!!!!Something she didn't want others to see."

"Nice deduction,Sherlock,"Satish looked amused.

"What're you doing?"Rohit asked Satish as he saw his friend intently twiddling with he QWERTY keyboard of his phone.

"Tagging you."

"What?"

"Yup.I updated my FB status-@Rohit Gupta cannot think 'straight'.Courtesy @Riya Basu."


"Are you outta your freaking mind?"Rohit shouted.

"Relax,cry baby,"Satish chortled."Just messing with ya.I didn't put that on my wall or anything."

"Fuck you!If people read that,they will think I'm gay.And not Riya."

"If you were gay,there would be no problems to begin with,"Satish said with sarcastic relish."You would have been the gay best friend which every good looking babe wants to have."

"Screw you!!"Rohit growled.

"You are using the terms 'fuck you' and 'screw you' quite frequently today.Makes me wonder.Are you gay?Like you have latent feelings for me or something?'Coz I'm totally straight." Satish made a faux-scared face as he shot off his joke.

"Fu.." Rohit started and then swallowed his words.Satish laughed out.

"I should just go ahead and break up with her,right?"Rohit asked after his friend had stopped laughing.

"Nyah.You should stick with her.Who knows you might get lucky."

"What?"



"You might land yourself in a threesome,you idiot!!" Satish grinned a toothy smile."Think about it."

~~~~~~
It was a Sunday.And the following day,it was back to office for Rohit and Riya.They worked at the same place.Rohit maintained a stoic,stubborn silence all the time Riya was in his vicinity.Finally Riya gave in,and confronted him near the coffee machine.

"We need to talk,Rohit."

"Ok.Talk,"Rohit crossed his arms.

"Not here.My place.Evening."

"Your place?Won't I be invading your and Annesha's privacy?"Rohit poured in a good helping of sarcasm into his tone.

"Annesha left yesterday night.And would you stop being so childish?"Riya couldn't mask her vexation.

"Childish? Woaah!I learn my gf is actually more interested in playing for the opposite team than mine.And I'm supposed to be all cool and calm about it!!Right??"

"That's what we need to talk about,Rohit.Gawd!Stop creating a scene here,"Riya almost pleaded.

"You were just playing me all the time!"Rohit accused.

"I wasn't."

"Oh yeah!Why did you hide this tiny little detail about your sexual orientation then?So insignificant it slipped your mind,eh?"

"I didn't tell you because I didn't want to hurt you."

"Hurt me?You make me laugh.Why on earth would you care about hurting me?It's not like you're in love with me or anything." Rohit's annoyance was growing steadily.

"I may not be in love with you.But I sure as hell do love you."

"Now,that's a new one."

"Why does love always have to be about romance and stuff?Is your definition of love really so narrow?"

"Ohh...so ..lemme...see...if I got this right...Riya Basu loves me...like someone loves her pet dog..right?"

"My gawd,Rohit.You are being so impossible right now."Riya shook her head in disappointment.Deep down,she knew Rohit didn't mean a word of what he was saying.He was babbling just because he was in too much pain.She wished she could ease his misery.But he wouldn't let her.

"Look,Riya,"Rohit's voice now took on a guilty softness."Things haven't been easy for me since this Saturday night.One moment,I'm head over heels in love with someone.And the next,I discover she’s less turned on by men than she is by women.It's just too much to process for me."

"I know,Rohit.I know,"Riya locked her eyes with Rohit's."But I wasn't using you.For god's sake,please don't make yourself believe that.That's as far from the truth as it can get."

"I dunno,"Rohit looked down at his feet."I need time."And he turned and left.Leaving Riya alone at the coffee machine.

~~~~~~
"Trouble is,I can see exactly how Rohit is feeling right now,"Riya said into the phone."He loves me like crazy, but if he's giving me all of himself, it's so normal for him to want the same from me.I feel so guilty for putting him through all this."

"I think the best thing to do is kinda start easing out of the relationship and try to preserve the best-friendship while it might be possible,"Annesha spoke into the other end of the line."That's the most he can get from you."

Riya was about to say something when her door-bell rang."Hey,I'll call you back,"she said and hung up the phone.She ran to the door,hoping it was Rohit.

It was just the cable guy,asking for the rental.

After sending him away with the money,Riya plopped dejectedly down on her sofa.She was about to call back Annesha when her bell rang again.She went tentatively to the door.To her relief,this time it was Rohit.

"I'm so glad you came,"Riya managed to say with a smile.

"Yep.I've a lot of talking to do myself,"Rohit replied,brushing his hand through his hair in that cute way.

"Ok,you first then,"Riya responded.

"Look,I've been thinking,"Rohit's voice became flat and grave."A lot.And I realized I cannot....I do not want to break up with you because you like girls.But if I don’t,what's in store for me? You're never gonna be with me both emotionally and sexually.And that's guaranteed to wear me down eventually."

"I do not want to break up with you,Rohit,"Riya's voice suddenly assumed a steely resolve.

"Why?Just because you're feeling too guilty to call it quits?"

Riya didn't have an answer to that.Somehow,she knew Rohit was right.
"Maybe it's just time to move on,"Rohit said.

"Rohit,don't go away,"Riya felt ashamed of herself for saying these words."I need you."
He was her emotional support, he was already the best friend.
And although her better judgement dictated otherwise,her heart was just not ready to let go.

Rohit quickly took her in his arms and hugged her tightly.He didn't want to leave her.The very thought scared him like hell.She was the only girl he ever truly loved.

But she wiggled uncomfortably in his embrace.And he knew.

"It isn't gonna work,is it?"he said,looking into her eyes.

"No."She wished it did though.Deeply so.

He unwrapped his arms from around her and said,"You know it is funny."

"What?"Riya asked curiously.

"See,all of us go about life,debating an abstract painting and being absolutely sure that what we see in the art is the correct interpretation," Rohit smiled smugly.

"What're you getting at?"

"When you move beyond what you're told you're supposed to be because of biology, the potentials are endless," Rohit looked over her shoulder to the wall behind as he uttered these words."Whatever gender means or doesn't mean is a shifting more and more every day."

"Yes," Riya's voice warmed.She was again beginning to realize why she liked Rohit so much."Strictly held beliefs fall by the wayside and the world changes.Today's convictions become fables of tomorrow."

"Precisely.Life is slowly lacking defined lines clearly pointing out what things should necessarily look like."

"Is that a bad thing?" Riya's gaze searched Rohit's eyes questioningly.

"No.Not at all." And saying this,Rohit bent his head and planted his lips passionately on hers.This time Riya didn't feel uncomfortable.Not the slightest.The remained like that for a full minute.

As Rohit finally withdrew,Riya asked,unable to contain her surprise,"Woaah!Did this....mean anything?"

"You tell me.Was it good?" Rohit smiled down at her.

"Yes.Very...very good,in fact." Riya's voice trembled noticeably and her cheeks became red.

"Good.It was a good-bye kiss." And saying this,he left.For good.

And surprisingly,neither Riya nor Rohit felt it could have ended any better.Love stories are usually of two kinds.Either the guy gets the gal or he doesn't.But just as there are people who don't identify along the binary of expected male or female roles,so are there some stories,which don't belong to either.

~The End~

Reactions:

14 comments:

  1. Wow! This was amazing.

    I guess somethings don't belong anywhere. They hold a place of their own. Just as this genre of storywriting and the concept.
    I liked the story. It presented before us a different kinda love and it's interpretation.

    Keep writing. :D

    ReplyDelete
  2. This was beautiful.!
    If this was an extract and i’d heard it in a promotion i’d be the odd idiot who’d be giving u a standing ovation. :D

    I loved it. xx

    ReplyDelete
  3. Loved the ending...you did manage to surprise me there..supah good :D

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  4. Mmm, lovely story. Glad they parted friends. Am also glad we acknowledge gays and lesbians as normal and natural. We've punished them for too long for something that is purely biological.

    ReplyDelete
  5. @Nihareeka He he thanks a lot...:-)

    ReplyDelete
  6. @Swarnali Yup..a moderately good ending can make up for a crappy story sometimes...:-)

    ReplyDelete
  7. @Rachika wish i had a few more followers like u..:-D

    ReplyDelete
  8. @KayEm Thanks mam!I tried.:-)

    ReplyDelete
  9. i have nominated you for the Liebster Blog award..do check at

    http://gautham88.blogspot.in/2012/07/month-of-honor.html

    ReplyDelete
  10. I liked the entire concept- this thing about the blurred lines around sexuality and friendship. Though it started out in a rather ordinary way but the story sure had a great ending!!!

    ReplyDelete
  11. OMG!!!!
    Dude , what are you ? what a freud-istic-ally awesome way of handling characters , perfect ending.
    had moist eyes when rohit hugged her ...and riya understood why she liked him * sob sob *
    By god ....awesome hai , story & you.. both!!!

    ReplyDelete
  12. @Miss Komal I'm glad people found this story interesting. :-) And your comment..made my day..Thanks so much...

    ReplyDelete
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